The Slayers' Fear!!!
by Deus
Summary: more plotless insanity, writen with Sarryn. (Sarryn: Hi everyone!)


Everything was happy and normal on the Vione for the Dragonslayers

No plot…..No plot….. and wow, more plotlessness! (Sarryn: Not only that but some rather interesting new people have joined…yes, oh one of little memory (Deus who is making comments while I type this), remember the gnats?) Oh, right.WARNING: Read only if you never, ever wish to have any hope of staying sane.

Everything was happy and normal on the Vione for the Dragonslayers. They were doing whatever it was that Dragonslayers did when not trying to hunt down Van and failing miserably doing that. Since all this is rather boring Sarryn decided to drop by. Upon seeing her they all feared, especially Dallet because wherever she went the amphoteric antelope was sure to follow. Speaking of said antelope it immediately appeared. Dallet screamed horribly and ran off. Ignoring him and his pursuer, Sarryn showed the Dragonslayers what she held in her hands (yes I AM in this for once) and they feared even more. 

It was…a PEN! (Ooohhh: from Sarryn)The formerly unrevealed method through which authors access their strange and unusual powers.At this precise moment Deus decided to drop in and ruin any dramatic effect."Oh, hi Sarryn." Upon seeing this she whipped out her Unabridged Webster's Dictionary of Modern English Words, then promptly collapsed under its immense weight.In response Deus (using his extremely expensive nifty pen, made by cross (in case any one was wondering) Sarryn: For 30 dollars!!!!! Deus: grr.) Writes an army of typewriters into existence, to enhance his strange and unusual author's powers.After his power's had been enhanced (Sarryn: You already used that word! Deus: So?) multi-fold, he attempted to write Sarryn out of existence.

(Smacking Deus for fiddling with the keyboard while she was trying to write, the story continues)

Instead he summoned a horde of kumquat wielding constipated gnat-men (Deus: Oh good God!) yes and they promptly began to do a rather…interesting rendition of River Dance! (Sarryn: I think the readers now fear). Sarryn took one look at them and momentarily disappeared into non-space. Everyone waited for a couple of minutes then forgot about her existence, unfortunately she wasn't really gone. A few hours later she reappeared dragging a rather petulant Dilandau who was unwilling to give her his flamethrower.

During her absence, Deus tried frantically to disappear the gnat-men, with only mild success.Unfortunately, he had to watch river-dance while working, which made that rather difficult. (Sarryn: Okay enough thinking must write or be prepared for major smackage) Deus would like to inform Sarryn that she is still owed a smackage for the mew-two story, now on to more important matters; the gnat-men were still there. Fortunately, Dilly accidentally set fire to them.Now anyone who knows much will realize that a highly oxygenated body of flammable solids (e.g. A dense cloud of gnats) will burn extremely quickly, resulting in an explosion.You have been warned. BOOOOOOOM.No more gnat-men.

Sarryn, overjoyed, gave Dilly a huge hug, momentarily forgetting that the flamethrower was still on. The Dragonslayers stood there watching her as she ran around the room screaming horribly. Someone brought out popcorn and they began to take bets on when she'd go out. From a small corner of the room the gnat-men ashes began to stir…dun, dun, duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

Deus, in a rare moment of pity, wrote a bucket of hydrochloric acid into existence and dumped it on Sarryn, ostensibly with the purpose of putting out the fire, but Sarryn couldn't really tell the difference. (Sarryn: Ow…the pain…)Next, he managed to convince a random penguin that the gnat-ashes were edible.This got rid of them, at least for now. (Sarryn: I would like to interject that I DID drag Folken off to a church in another story. Hah! Take that Deus, you who dared to doubt me! Ps. This has nothing to do with the story…sorry)The penguin, in an impossible moment of being endowed with the power of speech (this must be telepathic influence from Sarryn) spoke it's mind regarding the gnat-ashes, which it didn't know were such."These taste like gnat-ashes."

"Wahhhgghhh," Sarryn muttered for some reason (Sarryn: I actually just did that) then exploded into tiny balls of gelatinous goo. The goo, in an action similar to that liquid guy in T2, melded together and a non-crispy-critter Sarryn emerged. She gave Deus an evil look and whipped out the much feared…CHIBI COLLARS!!!

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"The exclamation went on for quite some time, outside, the sun could be seen to set, and then rise, and then set again, before it ended, strangely, no one could move during this time.

Momentarily taken off guard by that rather…long 'no' Sarryn gave him a look and then noticed Folken. Forgetting all about Deus and the collar, which she flung away and it attached itself to the neck of…Viole (it would've gone on Dallet but he was busy with the antelope). Folken saw her and feared.

"Folken, my one true love!" she shrieked (Deus: One? Try one of like 5, Sarryn: So the keyboard DOES count!) and promptly launched herself at him. (Sarryn: Yes him as in Folken, oh great knit picker).

Deus fearing for his life, (since character who live inside his mind would be….er….unhappy….if Sarryn did certain unmentionable, again for Deus' safety, things) frantically wrote a thick steel bubble into existence for Folken, made it airtight, shoved him in, and dropped him into the bottom of some very, very,very,very deep ocean.

"Um…airtight? Won't he sort of…suffocate?" Sarryn asked as Folken disappeared. There was a horrible crack as she breached the fourth wall. Because of this the world as they knew it, or didn't because Sarryn had run into a van thinking it was Van, which she still has yet to rectify with a certain co-writer, ceased and they all tumbled into the _lavender_ (Sarryn: Not pink, not pink, not pink!) anime void. 

Folken appeared as well, much to Deus' horror, and Sarryn magically, because she can and since she is typing this she says…er…types so, opened the bubble (Deus would like to mention that bubbles do not open, this comment will be ignored) and retrieved a rather blue looking angel dude. (Sarryn: It was not a large bubble! Besides he's a big guy, and therefore he uses more air than us normal…different people do). 

Deus would like to mention that considering Folken's height and body mass, he would use the same amount of air as a normal person, BUT he's _is_ missing an arm, and his mechanical replacement surely doesn't need blood, so logically, Folken would use _less_, not more, air than a normal person. (Sarryn: Don't try to confuse me with your fancy scientific reasoning. I said that's what happened and it did.)I wasn't saying that he _didn't_ use more air, I said he _shouldn't_.There is an important difference.

I get this eerie feeling there will be a sequel…..

(Sarryn: Why do I put myself in parentheses? Anyways…(she is momentarily dazzled by the bright light on Deus' optical mouse)…no they won't take over the world, the sporks out for blood will! Anyways, again, there will be a sequel…especially if any more Enya is played while she is in the room!)

One would think Enya would have a calming influence, but no, it seems to make it worse!I am officially ending this ending!

Well, not quite, REVIEW!It will make us happy (insanely so) and more likely to write more insanity.

(Sarryn: I'm trapped between the parentheses! Oh…don't you think telling them we'll write more will…scare them?)

EVERYONE FEAR, brought to you by Sarryn who has to have the last word, but probably won't unless she knocks Deus unconscious with the ugly cat candle.

DEUS Says: THE END (for now)


End file.
